“Raise and shine Upper Eastsider it’s officially Fall and when the leaves start to turn, we know it’s time for B.’s birthday.” Gossip Girl (Kristen Bell). Another episode, another party, yay… But wait! It’s Blair’s almost birthday party, and this one’s gonna be good.
And because I’m such in a good mood I give you two quotes:
“We’re not a couple, we’re not a war, we officially have no reason to interact besides social nicety.” Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick) to Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester). Mind you they were both in the beginning.
If you love Chair (or now Chorny) then you’ll love this episode. It was *jawdropping* and I still haven’t yet found the words to describe it. It wasn’t like last week, were I might have hated might of love it. I really, really love this episode. Best one so far.
[brief pause, if you’re annoyed with these just tell me]
I had to rewatch the “Chorny” scene… Two words: So hot.
Onward with these thoughts of mine:
Chorny with a side of Nate, Serena, and Dan; and dash of everyone else: The sun is shining; the birds are singing, and Blair celebrating her birthday one week earlier. Last year we got no birthday, the year before we got a Chuck-less birthday, and on her 17th birthday? Blair lost her virginity.
Now I think it safe to assume that everyone remembers the love fest in the back of Chuck’s limo, right? I mean this isn’t some big secret. So I think GG may have outdone themselves. Bravo.
But if I’m going to start from the beginning I have to beginning with our favorite socialite: Serena van der Woodsen… So what’s S up to right now? She slutting it up with Professor Colin, oh yea.
And they are having quite a stimulating conversation about… Honestly it wasn’t that important. The main thing was that they were eye-f*cking and were having a very good time. Too bad they’ll have to wait six more weeks of winter… Oh sorry wrong topic. Poor S, she’s trying so hard to be a good student, you go former-slut.
Moving on… We see: Eleanor. Yay! She’s come back to grace us with her presence With no Cyrus…
This actually makes me kind of sad,
I love Cyrus. But the whole of this scene was to show what a kickass mom that Eleanor has become. And dear lord… 23 hours in labor. Even Dorota looks surprised.
But anyways, Cyrus is there in spirit! He gave her a sign copy of “This I Remember”, thoughtful no?
But off to meets Serena… for what? You’ll see…
Next we see: The Humphrey men (including Eric). They have a few things to discuss (
gossip about) like Vanessa ( who cares), and Rily’s anniversary ( really don’t care), and Jenny’s stay in Hudson. Vanessa apparently has come back to Brooklyn and is force to room with Dan, oh the horror. Rily’s is being lame and spending their anniversary in the penthouse. And Jenny is in Hudson afraid of returning to the Upper Eastside, thank to Chuck and Blair. But seeing as how this is upsetting Rufus so much, Dan and Eric team up… to bring Jenny back home for at least a day. Their plan will be revealed after the NJBC get done with their secret meeting.
Speaking of NJBC… well at least half of them
Serenate together again, I don’t how to feel about that one. They didn’t work last season (for me) and now they’re all cutesy? I’ll back track a bit. Nate notices Serena’s “glow” or haircut (it’s similar to season 1 in ‘Hi, Society’ with Blair). He quickly assumes its Serena’s new beau, and he’s not wrong. Actually he’s exact words were: “If I know you there’s a guy at the end of that story.” Funny even Nate can tell when Serena’s getting laid. But anyway, they’re waiting for our favorite dynamic duo…
Cue the fireworks… Chuck and Blair have entered the room with the Avon Lady
So here’s the deal: Chuck and Blair have to have an official Peace Treaty O.O Ok? I didn’t know it was that serious, I mean they’re only 20. (Well Blair is). What happens if they don’t agree or violate the terms of the agreement? Excommunicated. Really you’re going to shun them? Hash.
(Oh Blair and Serena talked for like two second about Serena and her beau and Blair’s birthday bash. Blair wants nothing to do with Serena’s mistake. This is understandable, since she’s doing the same thing she did last year.)
But before they can cross the t’s and dot the I’s they have one matter to discuss… Serenate cannot be present for this. And apparently we don’t get to hear from this until later, boo.
Meanwhile, in a (galaxy) penthouse far, far away Eric and Dan are stalking Chair! I knew it they are secretly shipping Chair like the rest of us! Lol no, but wouldn’t that be funny… They noticed the two have finally made amends and aren’t happy about it. They desperately need Jenny back for Rily’s anniversary. They embark on a quest to get Chair… back on war mood. Honestly, their plan is lame. Just like their friendship. Eric says something like: “How good would it be to finally give a taste of their own medicine.”
Eric, they never did anything to him, like Blair stood by him when he outted himself. And Chuck was the first person he told. Chuck was his step-brother before Dan. Blair got to him during the Dare Night. I’m sorry I’m on the outs with Eric right now. I need happy news…
Another Chair moment, aww you shouldn’t have. Walking out of the restaurant? (What I wasn’t paying attention. Hello, Chuck and Blair have that affect on me). So they talk about not talking… After all they weren’t even friends… Wait wrong show. They have nothing to connect them other than the peace treaty. And did anyone love how Blair wouldn’t shake his hand… she didn’t want to get another hand orgasm
It was terribly depressing when Blair looked back and then Chuck looked back… I’m like please just kiss and make up
In the realm of the Crazies: Crazy Julie and Serena meet up? Well, no but it’s something like that. Serena confesses to Crazy Julie that she has the hots for Prof. C. Ok? Serena, this girl tried to pin you against your best friend not too long ago. Yea, she might have “saved” you from Vanessa, but hell everyone can tell she can’t be trusted. For shame S.
Crazy Julie works her magic on Serena one time and (sort of) convinces her that Prof. C. isn’t what he appears. In fact it looks like she’s helping Serena. Wait for it.
So while Serena walks away… Crazy Julie text her brother in jail. There we go… Oh we’re not going over this again. I just can’t deal…
So back to the Penthouse de Humphrey: Eric and Dan are still plotting, fail. Jenny, will come home, oh yes she will. If these two have anything to say about it. Plan once again lame. I mean Eric you’re plan last year with Blair was better, just saying.
Any who former-slut Serena has just turned into stalker-Serena… Creepy S.
Serena sees Colin with another girl! That jerk, even after all the eye-sex! Wait that’s just his housekeepers? Lame excuse buddy, lame. Just do it already and return Serena to her natural state of being.
Serena/Blair moment alert! It was brief and simple. The faculty of Columbia is invited to Blair’s party. Even the Dean… Seriously is this gonna be one of those party that forces everyone to be the small room together? It is… Secret Life stealer.
In Dan’s weakest performance, he stages a run in with Chuck. Dear lord Humphrey what was pitiful… Oh look it’s Blair. They tell Humphrey about the peace treaty, and Dan looks peeved. But what’s really interesting (or not) is that Blair knew where Jack Bass whereabouts…
Blair being Blair brushes it off and invites the boys to her birthday bash… Chuck agrees and Dan leaves (To clarify Dan leaves to go to Nate’s room)
Juliet and Serena moment: Colin speak, ugh I tried and Colin putting me in a bad mood. No more Colin speak please. The only thing that comes from this conversation is: Juliet’s plans are falling into place. Oh she’s going to Blair’s party.
Oh the Date front: Nate tells Dan about the peace treaty, about Serena’s new beau, and how more on the peace treaty… I sense the end of a the Date bromance… or as Gossip Girl would say: “I thought Nate and Dan were thick as thieves looks like Humphrey a thief and Nate just thick.”
Back to Serenate, wait what? I mean friendship… Nate’s going to be Serena’s buffer for Blair’s party…. No touchy, touchy on Prof. C., S Sorry Crazy Juliet, your shit out of luck.
Never fear Crazy Juliet has a plan… and it involves Colin. Oh yea!
So oh Blair news: Blair’s bitchy this afternoon and she’s letting it out on everyone. Dororta’s reasoning: “You not fighting with Mister Chuck so you fighting with everyone.” Make sense no? (Blair’s dress looked amazing)
Back to the bromance of Deric: They have just found out Chuck and Blair’s secret! Truth be told it’s not even juicy. Eric knows when he’s to fold so he’s out. But Dan nope not him. End of two bromances in one episode? Nice work Dan.
Blair’s party has two famous guest stars: Rachel Zoe and Robyn… they kind of matter, kind of don’t. It depends on who you’re asking.
In enters Blair, looking like a classic movie star. She spots with her little eye: the Dean of Columbia, perfect. They set up lunch.
Rily comes to play and Eleanor says hello. Actually anytime they make an appearance on my small screen I put mute. Sorry they are just so boring.
Crazy Julie and Colin come to play, not before being spotted by Nate Nate looks like he’s still hurting, poor Nate.
Serenate moment number 3… Not that I’m counting. Actually I’m warming up to a friendship with them. Just friends. Sorry, that’s just how I feel. Here comes Dan… and there goes Serena… And I’m actually confused. Serena and Nate with Dan. Then Dan and Nate. Then Serena and Juliet. There’s talk about a buffer. Then Eleanor? Enough of that.
Blair and Serena moment! Colin speak, no more! *cries* Doesn’t stop Serena from eye-sexing him
Rufus/Lily/Dan/Eric family together aww I stop caring 5 minutes s ago. I would love to go through a deep discuss about this family but I can’t bring myself to care. Oh by way dan went through with the plotting. Dan… oh Dan when will you learn.
Oh a more important news: Chair and Blair moment! They talk about Jack Why could they talk about Blair’s present from Chuck.
Another Serenate: Involving Gettysburg Address, eye-f*cking Colin, and Serenate adorable level. I know, I never would have put an of those things in the same sentence had I not seen it myself. It was pretty amusing to watch. Oh here come Rily, Serenate adorable level drops. (Colin may have slipped Serena something)
Nate then confronts the Professor, demanding he tell him if he’s “Ben”. Of course, that’s not Nate. Benny’s in jail with your father. Duh. And Crazy Julie told you that Benny was her brother.
So in a weird Nair moment… yes, I said Nair moment. Blair drags Nate to the kitchen…. There we see Crazy Julie and Colin! They’re arguing pretty heavily about Ben! *Gasp* Colin leaves Crazy Julie to clean up the mess while he sex-up Serena. Hehe I’m making it sound more scandalous than it actually is
Blair went to go warn Serena! Nate went to get a confession from Crazy Julie! And what did we learn from all this? Colin’s her cousin? Ok listen up Crazy Julie, are we to expect anymore of you crazy relatives? Like a sex-addicted Uncle or maybe Dead Pete’s your brother! It’s late excuse me.
Back to the party people! Dorota’s giving a speech about Blair and talking her tiara. It was very sweet. I need more Dorota/Blair moments <3
You know what’s surprising? Penelope still there! With the other minions of course but still! The original mean girl is still hanging in there!
Dorota to Blair: “Happy birthday Miss Blair!”
Have you ever had someone record you drunk? I have… It’s not pretty. But Drunk Blair is adorable; I want to drink with that girl. It’s a druck!Blair singing Stand by My Man by Robyn lmao. If you didn’t laugh you have no sense of humor.
And just Blair was about to stop it, she knocks down Rachel Zoe and causing her to land on her ass… and then a bowl of pudding to fall on her head. Blair looks to Chuck (she looks more embarrass by the pudding fiasco than the tape right around now)
Apparently this chick Rita had the tape, and was given the right to show it on Blair’s party. Asuming the worst Blair accuses Chuck for this mess and tell Eleanor exactly that. And Robyn sings? I don’t normally care for musical guest stars (except No Doubt… I’m a huge fan), so this is no exception.
Serena and Colin making each other jealous. I’m over them. Colin gonna leave and never come back, why should I care. They always leave (OTH reference).
Blair Waldorf is accusing Chuck Bass for the tape… Chuck your defense? He didn’t do it O.O Then who did?
Dan, he looks pretty proud (in about two second his smug smile will be wiped from his face). In comes Rufus… Tuned out. End results: Nate’s pissed at Dan. Rufus is pissed at Dan. Chuck pissed at Blair (Uncle, ring a bell). Blair’s pissed at the world. Eric’s sporting a sporting the latest Natefused look.
Oh that peace treaty? Gone. Well not literally, but it’s… you know what you’ll see.
Crazy Julie and Benny Jail-Bait have a little chat on losing things because of Serena. What the heck did this girl do? For those who have read the spoilers don’t tell me (if it’s come out, I’m trying to stay away from spoilers). Crazy Julie plan to get proof, got it. Wait why? So Serena can get expelled! But why?
Oh a sweet Blair and Eleanor moment, they have a sweet convo about the video, Rachel Zoe, and power women. Eleanor even opens up about the divorce and Cyrus.
Lily and Rufus. Penthouse with flowers? Eric and Dan way of showing them they care. Me? Not so much.
Oh look Vanessa’s on my screen… with Dan… you know what don’t care moving on…
Serena and Colin…. Ugh. And He’s with the New Serena? And she wants to wait. The old Serena was… I actually can’t tell the difference. Explain?
Serena kisses Colin (Crazy Julie wired the place) camera in the room. Did anyone else find it creepy that Crazy Julie looks up to the window. *coughStalkercough*
You know what I can explain the next scene but….
There are no words to describe that scene… Hater’s will hate but this scene was pure raw passion. Someone asked why I shipped them on Tumblr… All I have to say is this… No other couple has had this much passion. I still have to write that (memo-to-self)
PS… Blair spend her summer looking for Chuck Like Season 2…
Well I hope you loved the episode as much as I did Good night people
Sorry for the errors